More Alike Than Different: Building Friendships with People with Special Needs

“Be patient and look past their condition and see the person that they are. Once you do that, you will realise it's really such a joy to be with them” 

Social connections, such as friendships, are incredibly important for the emotional and physical well-being of Persons with Special Needs (PwSN). These relationships bring a sense of belonging, help boost self-esteem, and ease feelings of loneliness.  

Meet Estelle, a close friend to Julia, diagnosed with Autism. First knowing each other from being in the same church cell group, they grew much closer as time went on. 

At the start of their friendship, Julia was quiet and didn't talk. When prompted with questions, Julia would either nod or say a one word answer. However, after reaching out to her and initiating conversations, she gradually opened up, sparking deeper conversations. 

While acknowledging that her friendship with Julia has changed her for the better by helping her show more kindness and understanding to PwSN, Estelle admits that it can be challenging at times. “She is very shy, so sometimes I need to repeat myself more than one time,” said Estelle, admitting that such instances can be frustrating. Though frustrating, Estelle has learned that being patient and giving her time is important for Julia.

Another challenge Estelle faces is that when something bothers Julia, she can get quite upset. However, when that happens, Estelle tries to calm Julia down and get her to explain why she is upset. Afterwards, they’ll try to think of a solution to help her.

Estelle recalls a moment when Julia was open to share with her about the worries she had in her life. This incident showed Estelle that Julia was more comfortable with her and that they had really grown closer. One of the things that really brought them closer was communicating clearly with each other, “It helps us to get to know the other person's likes and dislikes and helps us get along much better,” said Estelle. 

Like any meaningful relationship, friendships with PwSN can involve patience and learning, but they’re also deeply rewarding. Hoping to eradicate the fear of interacting with them, Estelle shares that PwSNs are kind people who are just like you and me, having the same hopes, dreams and worries.